PHP work... and 10 more characters because that's the minimum

If you're a contractor that generally gets frustrated at the stupidity and laziness of people, then this job could be for you. I employ 15+ people via Upwork / Freelancer, have real-world projects that have ongoing work. I'm sick of hiring people that disappear after one day. I'm sick of people applying with generic cover letters. I'm sick of people who do spend 7 days saying their working on the code, and then email me to say they can't do it. So here's the deal... If you apply... you are agreeing to the following conditions: - I'll hire you immediately to do a "test" project which will take any good coder about 5 hours MAX. This will be modifying some existing code that works fine but needs some changes. It's PHP, no framework, calls a scraping API and returns the data into a database. Quite simple. - No money will be put into escrow, no money will be paid to you... until I'm happy you've done the first "test" project and it's done within 3 days. Then I'll pay you for the time you've spent. - From there, I'll give you as much ongoing work as you like, at a rate you decide. Work will all be PHP and you can chose to do high-end scraping / analytics, UI, Wordpress, etc... it's entirely up to you. To avoid disappointment I'd suggest you put in your application what work you're interested in and at what rate to avoid being hired for work you don't like / can't do. - I won't answer any questions until after I've hired you If you feel this is a ridiculous job posting and feel that I'm trying to scam you, or that it just isn't worth it, then don't apply. By applying I assume you're willing to take the risk to play it by the rules set out above. PS: All those non-idiots out there that are actually great coders looking for great work AND can speak English quite well AND knows how frustrating it is to find good contractor... we'll get along just fine; don't worry about a thing. Enjoy!